During intro tape as the band takes the stage:
- Bill: Turn the fuckin' music off man

Before The Real Thing:
- Roddy: How you goin' out there? Good? Oh that's good.
- Bill: Any of you fuckers out there in the navy?

During the first Last To Know attempt, part of the lighting rig falls on the stage:
- Patton: Oh shit! Oh god! This is trouble...
- Roddy: Wow... everyone ok?
- Bill: Anybody get hurt?
- Roddy: I didn't see it fall
- Patton: I didn't see it either
- Bill: It was actually a good thing
- Patton: I feel like I missed something
- Roddy: It was part of the show!
- Bill: Now we know each other a little better
- Patton: Did you guys see the little bomb that went off first
- Roddy: Like Metallica... You think we should put it back up? Yeah fuck it huh?
- Bill: Do you guys really care about the fuckin' lights anyway?
- Patton: Yes they do because they want to see the new guy...
- Roddy: Yeah! Dean!
- Bill: Secret weapon
- Roddy: Dean knocked it over
- Patton: He knocked it over, fuckin' guy needs attention
- Bill: Fuckin' dick
- Patton: Fucking parents have been ignoring him all his life so, we thought we'd give him a job
- Bill: Let's do a different song huh?

After the Easy solo:
- Patton: They like you

Before What A Day:
- Patton: How'd that one sound without bass?
- Roddy: There's no power. We don't got any power on this side of the stage.
- Patton: These guys don't have any power over here ..
- Roddy: Look!
- Patton: ... but we do.
- Roddy: Look! No sound! Look! What's wrong?! What's wrong?!?!
- Patton: These things happen from time to time.
- Bill: So what should we talk about now?
- Patton: I don't know, I wish we had some music so we could put them on hold.
- Bill: This is really fuckin' embarrassing
- Patton: This is embarrassing. Now you guys get to see what boring sons of bitches we really are.
- Bill: We've got fuckin' nothing to talk about.
- Patton: Nothing to say.
- Roddy: What's that ugh... dog whistle?
- Patton: There we go!
- Roddy: Hey you guys just start.

During Take This Bottle, Patton asks the bar for a drink:
- Patton: I'll have a Campari with soda. Come on fucker, pass me one. Not too much ice. How much?! How much?! Anybody got a Pound?

During From Out Of Nowhere, his drink is delivered:
- Patton: Oh my god! I love you! Thank you so much!

During The Crab Song intro:
- Bill: Hit it Dean
- Roddy: You're Jim, and I'm Roddy, let's play. I'm pretending you're Jim.
- Dean: Don't do that...
- Roddy: I can't help it
- Dean: ... it hurts

Before Evidence:
- Roddy: Thanks a lot we're gonna try a new one, ready? It starts with four clicks.

Before Caffeine:
- Bill?: Thanks a lot! Here's an oldy but shitty for ya